Black Friday is a rite of passage for consumers. It’s a time-honored tradition that cuts Thanksgiving short, makes shoppers crazy, and gets us in massive amounts of credit card debt that we won’t be able to pay off until well into the new year. Since the pull of capitalism is so strong, eventually you’ll cave and decide to partake in the holiday retail frenzy. (There are a lot of great deals, after all.) If you dare to venture out on Black Friday this year, steel yourself mentally beforehand with our honest timeline. Be strong, gift buyers. And don’t forget to get a little something for yourself. You’ve earned it.
Cover Photo: Tay Rees (Getty Images)
Black Friday Honest Timeline
5 AM: You pick up your partner in crime.
6 AM: Waiting in line.
8 AM: The doors open.
8:30 AM: The freak flags are flying.
9 AM: Things get physical.
9:30 AM: Your shopping partner gets in a scuffle.
10 AM: Complete chaos ensues.
10:30 AM: You get the worst cashier in the world.
10 PM: You wake up in a full-body cast.
Cyber Monday 8 AM: You take advantage of online sales.